I Didn't Cry

I didn't cry, I didn't cry when I had nothing to say, I didn't cry when I couldn't say, I didn't cry when I hoped for things I could never have, I didn't cry when I slowly lost all my friends, I didn't cry when I found out I could never share what I felt, I didn't cry when I couldn't be like them, I didn't cry when wanted to, I didn't cry when my dreams were clouds - beautiful but unreachable, I didn't cry when I was never counted among the pretty ones, I didn't cry when I was forgotten, I didn't cry when I didn't matter, I didn't cry when my friends were mades Kings and Queens and I was made a messenger, I didn't cry when I was made an extra in a play where my friends were leads, I didn't cry when my parents didn't have a kid to be proud of, I didn't cry when I realized that I didn't have a particular talent, I didn't cry when life gave me tomato flavoured chips which I hated, I didn't cry when I wasn't funny just quiet, I didn't cry when I thought I didn't have a personality, I didn't cry when I couldn't speak in public, I didn't cry when I knew I wasn't special, just normal.
I didn't cry but I got up everyday, smiled, laughed, lived a little, pretending to be a part of something I could never be. I didn't cry, I never cried... I just ate the tomato chips, they tasted ok but I disliked them not because of their flavour but because there were tastier chips out there which I could eat...

Maybe

They say that my life is normal; my life is good because there is no drama, heartache, dreams, wishes, special people and a purpose. My life is great because I don’t have to go through all the pain people suffer. But maybe I don’t want a normal life. Maybe I want to feel the pain because before or after the pain was a period of happiness too, I want that. Maybe my life is not so great after all because it has nothing; it is pain, simple and boring. Maybe I want thunder, rain, sunshine, snowfall and hurricanes. People say I am lucky but I think they are lucky because something is happening to them. Someone actually texts and calls them because they miss them or because they just want to talk not because they have some work with you. Maybe I don’t want the most interesting that happened to me yesterday to be about the tasty food I ate. Maybe I just want to life rather than a good life, maybe I just want to live and love, maybe I just want to start my story.

Maybe

.................

He was behind her or he was in front of her but he was never with her. If he was with her, it was never for long. It was never long enough to be satisfied, long enough to be sure, long enough to be sure and never long enough to be with her.

Ever have that feeling when you see a person that if they knew you, they would love you, understand you, live with you, dream with you, have fun with you and maybe never forget you. She got that feeling when she saw him. Him; walking, laughing, talking, doing all the mad things he does. She was never the girl that boys could talk to effortlessly, she was never the prettiest, she was never the funniest and she was ok with it until he came around and he made her want to all those things just because she wanted him to see her, actually look at her just once.

Everyday she would look at the mirror and sometimes would not even recognize what see saw. She had that feeling that her face is not her own, it felt somehow foreign sometimes. It was a good face but there was nothing extraordinary about it. Maybe that was the problem, maybe her face wasn’t good enough. Everyday after staring at the mirror for longer than necessary thinking that maybe today will be the day when this face will stand out. She would step out again into the world for yet another time waiting, hoping for the world to change.

 ...................

Life Is A Road trip

I find life like a road trip. It has a beginning and an end. Everybody is born with a known or sometimes unknown destination or purpose. Your life maybe short or long like a trip to the supermarket or a trip to the other side of a country. Everything is constantly moving but it doesn’t mean that you are seeing the same type of things. A road trip can be a lot of things – exciting, adventurous, boring, sad, happy, depressing, scary, boring and so can be life, it just depends who is driving. Feel free to take risks, do anything you want because you get one road trip like this and you might want to make this one count.